Betting

I have a small electronic poker game that I occasionally play. I kind of bet on a whim. You can bet up to 50 in increments of 10. If I'm feeling good I bet 50, if I'm not feeling it at all I bet 10, other than that I bet somewhere in the middle. Obviously there is no rhyme or reason to it, you have to bet before you see any cards. I got to wondering what that says about me and how I approach my life. Do I hold back too much? Am I totally random on how much I am willing to risk? Why place a partial bet? You either believe you've got it or you don't, why go halfway? There's no benefit to it, it's just being chicken and living life in the middle. It's kind of a cop out, a way to NOT make a decision when a decision has to be made. The only thing it accomplishes is to make me made when I SHOULD have gone all in.

Other life lessons from poker:

1. Sometimes you are so busy looking for what you want you don't see what you've got. If you are focused on the possibility of getting THE card you need to create THE hand you are aiming for then you are likely to miss any other possibility. The result is that you could fold a hand that could have won because you just didn't see it until it was too late. Are you focused on a particular outcome in life? Are you frustrated because you are getting what you want? Maybe it's time to take a fresh look at your hand. There's probably something there you aren't seeing.
2. Sometimes all you see is what you've got and you miss what's going on around you. Have you ever been completely excited about what's going on in your life and been blindsided by what you've missed in someone else's? Sometimes you just look like a complete jerk, but sometimes you end up losing big time! Don't forget to take a look around, and remember, not all their cards are on the table.
   
3. Sometimes you don't have faith in what you've got and you overestimate what others have. Some of us are so down on ourselves that we just can't see that what we have to give could be valuable. Whatever we have we feel others have something better, therefore it just doesn't matter what we have. Do you really want to stand before God one day and explain that you didn't accomplish what He put you on this earth to do because you thought someone else's hand was better?
   

Too cute

Check this out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EqHfCyOnuS4

Oh, the possibilities...

My mad hatter brain is wondering how we could use this idea (moving walls) during an Experience (church service) to really freak people out and make an unforgettable point.

Love it!

Did you see this coming? http://haha.nu/entertainment/science-education-in-denmark/

I'm a little slow

I'm embarrassed to say how long it took me to get this:

http://haha.nu/entertainment/hat-fail/

Vacation Week

I figured for vacation week I'd just post a funny or fascinating link each day. Today we are flying so I thought I'd try this:

http://haha.nu/entertainment/illusions-tricks/airplane-toilet-paper-trick/

Think they'll let me?

Warehouse 13

There's a show called Warehouse 13. It's about two secret service agents that were recruited to do a job that's incredibly important but incredibly secret. Not doing the job jeopardizes the world, but it's a job that sucks the life out of them and they are feeling it. Some of us feel like that. Whether it's parenting, ministry or something else, we've hit a point where we just don't know how much more we could possibly give.

So what do you do? Do you quit? If not, is there a way to combat it? Are there perks you aren't taking advantage of that balance it out? Of course there is. The problem is we are focusing too much on the task and not enough on the possibilities. We go into the situation with a sense of responsibility rather than curiosity. We carry a sense of dread with us that clouds our vision.

If you are feeling like this then it's time to take another look at your situation. Find a new perspective. Enter your day with sense of wonder looking for opportunities for life and joy and laughter. So called "psychics" make their living off the idea that if you say something is going to happen to someone they look for it to happen. It's human nature. So use that to your advantage. Find something to look for tomorrow that will brighten your day. Find a way to breathe new life into whatever situation is sucking the life out of you.

So many times we look at our lives and see the rut that we are in and accept that we are stuck there. Why is it that we can look at someone else's rut an see a way out but assume we are stuck in ours. Step back and take a fresh look. Yes, you are in this situation and you are tired, but take a breath. Write down your story like you would if you were telling a friend, then read it as if it were someone else's story. Ask the questions you would ask someone else. Find God's hand in this. Look for the blessings you've forgotten. Look for advise you've given but not taken. Pray over it in a new way.

The check-mark of life

Life's ebb and flow can sometimes look like a check-mark. If you want to go higher than you ever have before then you usually need to take a dip first. Sometimes that means getting rid of something like a habit or dealing with a hurt or removing someone from your life. Sometimes it means you have to hit something bad enough to make you want to go higher. Sometimes it just means you need to rest up first. Whatever it is, it's good to recognize the dips as a potential point in life for acceleration rather than just in inconvenient dip. I don't know about you, but I HATE missed opportunities.

I don't care how it sounded

When you are speaking about your faith, do you ever worry that you are sounding like you are speaking about something out of the X-Files? I don't know about the god you serve, but MY God is indescribable. He constantly blows my mind! I love to talk about Him and when I do the eyes of those I'm speaking to inevitably get as big as saucers. For the most part it's fine because I know my audience and that's what they come to me for. They love for me to help them make their "God box" bigger. But when you are speaking to someone else, someone whose faith is shaky or does not share your faith at all, should you speak differently?

I can hear people saying, "I don't care how it sounds" concerned that they are watering down their faith, or shortchanging God. Should we care more about expressing the greatness of our God or about meeting those God loves where they are at? Can we meet them where they are at without watering down the truth? Do we need to put it into their language? Maybe not tell them the whole truth? What's best? I truly don't think any of this matters if we have our hearts and heads right. The problem is anything that includes the word "I". Do you think that God really cares how you feel about the situation when it comes to a lost or confused soul?

Matrix

I LOVE the move Matrix. It's so cool to think about your life in two dimensions. The Bible does say the we live in this world, but we are not of this world. It also says that we wrestle not with flesh and blood but we war with the powers of darkness. The Matrix makes that visible to me, and it got me thinking...what would a movie about your spiritual life look like? If you are living more for this world than you are living in the spiritual then it would be a pretty boring movie. You'd only be making the occasional appearance and/or it would be a very short movie. If you are only living out your spiritual life in your prayer closet then it's probably a pretty sad movie of you watching and praying and worrying on the sidelines. The blockbuster movie would probably be a raging battle. Someone who, like Jesus, does their prayer at the start of their day to prepare themselves and receive their daily instructions then takes their faith out into the world and uses it to bring light to the dark places. That's where the battle rages. That's where heroes are made. That's where the excitement is. Now a part of me is not convinced that we are all called to be warriors. I believe some of us are called to be medics, some trainers, etc., but I believe we are all called to the battlefield in one capacity or another. Aren't we all supposed to put on the full armor of God? God does not waste anything, so what is the armor for if not the battlefield and the makings of a pretty exciting story fit for a blockbuster film?

Fear and strength

I was thinking today about spiders. When hubby is away and I find a spider I kill it. I certainly don't enjoy it, but I suck up my fear and do it. I don't (usually) hem and haw and squirm like I do when hubby is around to take care of it for me. Why is that? It got me thinking...are we only as strong as we need to be. Why am I braver when hubby is away then when he's here? The only reason I can think of is that I don't HAVE to be so brave when I have hubby to hide behind.

Now when it comes to something like speaking in front of a group I'm braver when I'm doing it as an example for someone else. If I'm supposed to speak regarding something that will benefit me, my business for example, I'm terrified! But if I'm speaking to show someone I'm trying to help out how easy it is then I have very little trouble with it. I'm braver for someone else than I am for myself.

Why is that? Is that part of God's design for us? Is this His way of showing us the we are better when we are doing for others? Or is this just one of the things that no one else notices and is unique to me? Are you more brave for others? Are you only as brave as you have to be?

Not letting go

You know how sometimes your fingernail will catch on something, then it bothers you, and you just keep messing with your fingernail. Sometimes you chew on it, sometimes you pick at it, but whatever you do, you don't forget it. Unless you are one to carry a nail file around with you it seems that you make the nail much worse than it has to be, and much worse than it would have been if you would have just left it alone.

Isn't that the way it is with life? We're going through our day and something snags. Maybe it's a phone call or a sharp word from someone, or an unexpected project or someone stands you up. Whatever it is, while we physically go on to the next thing our mind and heart are still picking and chewing at that snag. We are then robbed of the moment we are in and making a bigger deal of the previous situation than it deserves, usually making it worse.

What kind of "nail file" can you carry around with you to help you solve this problem?

Weird dream

I can usually figure out where a dream came from. Sometimes it's from a conversation, sometimes from something on TV, but not this one. On this one I'm clueless.

There was an Indian boy in the woods. His village had been slaughtered. He was ten or so and had learned enough to survive on his own. There were other survivors, but they had scattered. Over the years he'd run into some others but for the most part he stayed on his own until he met another boy. The two of them became close friends and stuck together. This friend began to tell him of a legend of an Indian legend. I don't know if there were details of the legend in my dream, if there were I don't remember them, but the gist of it was there was an Indian who secretly helped others. This really struck a chord with our boy and he so badly wanted to believe the legend was truth and wanted to meet his new hero. As the years went on the legend grew. He would hear about him from more and more people and he became convinced it was real.

One day he was told his hero was just recently in a nearby village! He hurried there thinking he was hot on his trail. Maybe there would be some way to track him! When he arrived the villagers brought him the evidence of the legends recent visit. It was a gift of food that he himself had left. HE WAS THE LEGEND! How do you think he reacted? He was DEVASTATED!

Weird dream? I thought so.

Do you ever feel like this?

Proverbs 1:²⁴ “I called you so often, but you wouldn’t come.

I reached out to you, but you paid no attention.

²⁵ You ignored my advice

and rejected the correction I offered.

²⁶ So I will laugh when you are in trouble!

I will mock you when disaster overtakes you—

²⁷ when calamity overtakes you like a storm,

when disaster engulfs you like a cyclone,

and anguish and distress overwhelm you.

²⁸ “When they cry for help, I will not answer.

Though they anxiously search for me, they will not find me.

²⁹ For they hated knowledge

and chose not to fear the Lord.

³⁰ They rejected my advice

and paid no attention when I corrected them.

³¹ Therefore, they must eat the bitter fruit of living their own way,

choking on their own schemes.

How many times do we give advice and warn and plead with people to change their path to no avail. How many times do we think we are making progress and yet they turn right back? We are preached at to never give up on someone, yet here the attitude seems so different. Recently I've come to the conclusion that some people aren't going to really change until they've hit rock bottom, and maybe that's what's being portrayed here. The person doesn't listen and Wisdom has done all it can until they hit the point where they have no choice but to listen. So Wisdom doesn't sit and worry and try to fix it and go through all the things we doting types put ourselves through. No, it shrugs and chuckles and says, "What did you expect?" Then Wisdom moves on, rejecting their pleas, knowing that they haven't yet come to that point where they are really going to change. Wisdom saves its energy and efforts for those who are ready now. Wisdom will stop wringing its hands realizing that this is a part of life, something that simply must happen in this persons life. That constantly coming to their rescue is enabling them and hurting everyone involved. Wisdom moves elsewhere, separating itself from the situation, until the time is right.

Reward for Lost Whimsy

Okay, so I have not blogged for the past couple of days. Is it because I have nothing to say? No, it's because I'm tired of being so philosophical. When I was a kid I LOVED creative writing. I would write just because. I remember when Sears would have displays of word processors. I would get bored as Mom was shopping for who knows what so I would find the word processors and type away. I would make up a story just for fun. I would giggle as I walked away imagining the person coming ever so innocently upon a story about the man who got his finger stuck up his nose, or whatever I decided to write that day.

It used to come so easily. Now, however, it seems that if there is no purpose behind it I have a hard time bringing myself to do it. Where does that come from? Where has my whimsy gone? How do I get it back? I think it may have gone with my brother when he left. Alright, God. I think you are either going to have to bring my brother back or bring me someone like him because life without whimsy is not a good thing.

Right vs. Best

What is it that makes some of us so eager to correct? When I see or hear something wrong I am just DYING to make it right. Whether it's tucking in a tag sticking out of the back of someones shirt, or stopping them from making a mistake, or correcting their ill-gotten opinion on something, I have a hard time focusing on anything else until the wrong is "righted".

I read somewhere that all you have to do is walk into Baskin-Robbins to figure out that perfection comes in many different flavors. I'm embarrassed to admit that reading that was an eye opener to me. Why it didn't occur to me that my idea of perfection wasn't shared by everyone I have no idea, but okay, I'm waking up on that one. It's quite the relief too. By letting go of the reigns I'm a lot less tired and a lot more curious about the other flavors. It's interesting to see what others come up with.

The other truth that I'm discovering is that even when someone is blatantly wrong making sure they are corrected is still not necessarily the best thing to do. For instance, if someone has given up on their child and they state that they are better off with no contact with them is it better to correct that statement or to minister to the hurt they are feeling? If someone is struggling with their sexuality do they need one more person to look at them with disgust and preach to them about the clarity of the Bible on the subject or do they need someone to show that they care more about them as a person than who they are attracted to?

As I've been pondering this right vs. best question I've been frightened at the impression I've been leaving on others. No wonder Christianity has gotten a reputation for being judgmental. No wonder people think that giving their lives to Christ means giving up their Sundays and submitting to a bunch of restricting rules. When you look at the life you lead that is witnessed by those outside of the church, what are they seeing? Are they seeing someone just like them? Are they seeing someone living by a bunch of restricting rules? Or are they seeing a life that they've always wanted to have, a free life, transformed by Love?

10 Things I learned about evangelism from Shark Week

1. You have to go where they live. Yes, there's the occasional rogue shark, but that's rare. Whether it's catching a shark or evangelism, it's unrealistic to expect them to find you, unless you've gone to where they live.
2. Check your attitude going in. There is a man who has learned to swim with great white sharks unprotected. What he's learned is that the sharks can pick up on his emotions and react differently to him according to his mood. If he wants a nice calm swim, he has to be nice and calm going in. If he's unsettled, so are they. Obviously the sharks aren't picking up on his emotions through his words or body language, they can just pick up on it. If sharks can, don't you think humans can?
   
3. Purify yourself. There's a tribe that's been dubbed the "Shark Tribe" because of their centuries old traditions that have been successful at attracting and catching sharks with their bare hands. There is a purification ritual that they must go through before they can go on a hunt. It's interesting, because this ritual consists of staying away from things that the Bible says is unclean. Do not eat certain foods, do not touch a dead animal, etc. Whether it's the actions themselves or just making what they are preparing to do sacred I don't know. I do think it is wise to take a look at evangelism as something as something sacred that you need to prepare yourself for.
   
4. If you want to attract a lot of them you have to bait the water. If you want to attract them, and you are not attracting them currently, than you have to do something different.
   
5. They are sensitive to movement. The quickest way to attract a shark is by flopping around like an injured fish. Flopping around sends waves immediately. I guess that means to evangelize we have to make our presence known. We can't hide inside the four walls of the church and expect them to come to us. We have to make some waves so they will come and investigate and see what all the noise is about.
   
6. Sharks are attracted by sight. They don't go after everything. If it looks like their prey they go after it, otherwise they don't. You can't attract a shark unless you present yourself as interesting. Evangelism has to be relevant. If you want to reach the lost you have to look like something that interests them.
   
7. They are sensitive to smell. Everyone knows sharks can detect the presence of blood from very far away. When it comes to evangelism, the Bible says they will know you by your fruit. If your fruit is rotten, filled with an agenda, they will be able to detect it. Especially in today's world when we are all hyper sensitive to being sold a bill of goods. People can tell when they are being sold to and when someone really cares. Are you pushing your agenda, do you just not like it when someone is different than you, or do you really care about what's best for them?
   
8. You can't be mad at them for doing what they do. When you are around sharks you can't expect them to act like you. Sharks investigate with their teeth. If you are where the shark lives and have attracted them to you, you can't be upset when they test you to see if you're what you claim to be.
   
9. They are not mindless predators. You can't think that just because you are doing the things that you know they like that you'll have them hooked. Yes, you can do everything right to attract them, but once they bite it's got to be the real thing.
   
10. Word travels fast, and they have a good memory. There are some old shipwrecks that are a magnet to reef sharks. Once a diver injured one of the sharks. Within a day or two all of the sharks were gone and they did not come back for two years! We've got to be careful!
    

I am a rung on a ladder

I am a rung on a ladder

I get people to the next level
I am not a fun rung
I am not a place people want to be
I am not where people invite their friends to come hang out
I am a lonely place, a hurting place
I am a place where people bring their garbage and leave it

I am a rung on a ladder

I am dirty and broken
I feel the weight that they carry and crack under the pressure
I am smeared with the grime that they've left behind
I see the next one coming and the next one
I am afraid that I cannot bear one more
I don't know what else to do, it's what I was built to do

I am a rung on a ladder

I am afraid of what they are going to do to me
I give them all of me and then they move on and forget me
I feel so used
I brace myself as the next one comes
I fall in love with them as they put their trust in me
I am so proud of them when they make it to the next rung

I am a rung on a ladder

I am humbled to be able to witness this stage in so many lives
I may not be the party rung
I may not be where people hang out
I get to witness the most amazing transformations I can imagine
I am privileged to have a hand in caterpillars turning into butterflys
I get to see victims transformed into legacy builders

I am a rung on a ladder

I can't imagine any other role
I don't want any other life
I don't want to love in any other way
I am so blessed to be me
I don't want this to ever be taken away
I want to forever be me

I am a rung on a ladder!

Spinnin' Around

There's a song I love, or used to love (I haven't heard it in a while), called Spinnin' Around. It talks about how God's ways are completely backward from the world's ways:

A is last, Z is first
Living life in reverse
'Cause that's the way it works

You can check out the rest of the lyrics here. This song is so true. God's Word tells us that you must be last to be first, you need to be weak to be strong, you need to die to live....

I was watching So You Think You Can Dance last night and there was a dance done by the final two girls depicting a journey. They started at one end of the stage and "journeyed" toward the other end. There were times when they'd move forward, sometimes backward. Sometimes they'd leap, sometimes they'd fall. Sometimes they looked graceful, sometimes their bodies were contorted. Their skirts were made of layers of fabric and throughout their journey they'd shed layers.

It got me thinking about life and its supposed burdens. We all have a journey and places we need to go to in life. My husband likes to say that if the journey is easy you are moving in the wrong direction (I have such a wonderfully smart husband). Along the journey it seems like sometimes we move forward, and rarely are we graceful, but mostly we are falling, or being stopped, or contorting, or moving backward. The causes of these delays and these discomforts are what we refer to as burdens. I love the dance because they aren't putting on the layers, the layers are coming off.

That's why I said supposed burdens. Are they really burdens or the instruments used to break us out of the confines that are limiting our potential? And if that's the case should we stop fighting them and dreading them? If they are really tools used to better us and we recognized them as such would our journey transform? Would the process become shorter and less painful and the recovery process quicker? Would we need less of them because we would no longer be damaged in the fight against them? Or because we actually learned something from them?

What are you fighting against right now? Take a moment and try to see it as a tool God is using to free you. I know it's hard, but really try. How could this new perspective change things?

It's all about attitude!

I find myself stressed and overwhelmed a lot of the time. It's something I really struggle with, even as a child I fought migraines. I don't know if I've struggled with it more or just gotten more frustrated with it during this past year, but it's like I've suddenly become aware that these feelings are not what God intended for us. My argument with God started early this year when I started teaching a Sunday School class. I had no desire to teach a Sunday School class, I do not like being in front of people at all! But there was this book that was changing my life, and our church was doing a series on it. I knew in my heart that if the congregation had the opportunity to dig deep into what they had just heard in the service, rather than leave and let life immediately get in the way, that their lives could be changed forever. I knew that if it was in my power to make that kind of difference that it would be wrong not to, and I knew God wanted to use this to push me out of my comfort zone so He could use me in new ways in the future. I obediently followed through, and halfway through the series I was so DONE!! I regretted doing it and dreaded each week until it was over. I lifted my eyes toward heaven and said to God, "I'm doing what YOU told me to do and look what it's doing to me! Here I am trying to be obedient and forget my fears and all I'm getting is headaches! Why would you do this to me?" He simply said, "It's not what I'm asking you to do that's stressing you out and making you feel this way. It's you fighting what I'm asking you to do." Oh. That's food for thought right there. It certainly took the wind out of my sails.

Okay, so I got what He was telling me and everything has been peachy since, right? No. This has been a whirlwind year. There have been so many changes. As much as I love change and crave it in my life, there's a limit to how much one can handle. Last week was the height of it for me. I think I had a week long migraine, nausea and all. Again, I'm asking God, "What's up? It still all seems to be coming from you!" I didn't get that nice clear voice immediately responding this time but, through prayer, reading and a wonderful conversation with my mom, I got some clarity.

When I look at my "To Do" list I get this dreadful overwhelmed feeling. My attitude is "look at all these things that I have to do." Inevitably when I'm at my peak of overwhelmed is when there's a phone call or when my husband needs my help with something, or something or someone I just can't say no to needs my help. Again, that happened again and again last week! So here's my clarity: what if I looked at each thing on my To Do list and asked myself what opportunity it holds? What is the best outcome of this task? How could it bless someone? If I let go of control (and dread), what can God do with this? What if, instead of looking at it as a task, I looked at it as a tool to make a difference? What if I let go of the responsibility side of it and grabbed onto the possibility side of it?

So what about you? How do you handle the stresses of life? Do you feel you are living your life the way God intended?

Hello!

I've been encouraged to blog for a long time now but I'm just now getting around to it. It just seems like so much work! And what do you say?

I started a private blog last year and found it very therapeutic, but a public one? I tend to be a very private person. Along the way though a couple of things happened. First, I started to feel the urge to write a book. No, not and urge like I WANT to write a book. I wish! Nope, I just felt like I was learning things that others, if I shared it with them, could really benefit from. I'm a Christ Follower, and if you are too then you know that it tends to turn your life upside down. I started to work on my book and it started sounding like a series of lectures. Not good. That's when my husband encouraged me ONE MORE TIME to blog. I need to discover my voice.

The second thing was that I was discovering things to say, and discovering through my private blog how writing about it helps you sort it out and discover more through the process. So here it is. I have a blog. I make no promises. This is just me finding my voice. If I knew what it sounded like I wouldn't have to discover it, would I?